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Last week I accidentally wrote New Year’s Resolutions (and I loathe New Year's Resolutions) when a bestie asked me what are: 5 old self things that you want to let go of 5 new self things you want to move towards 5 things about yourself that never change A little trick is if you look at your list of things you’d like to change, write the opposite down for “what you want to bring closer” because that’s 👏what 👏you 👏actually 👏want. For example: one thing I want to let go of is trusting other people’s opinions more than my own. The opposite of that is self-trust, which is, in fact, what I truly desire. When I finished, I realized without trying, I had a clear list of intentions of how I want to live my life. Big encouragement to take some time to do this. I sent it to my group chat and then the coven discussed later that night when we met up. Let me know how it goes! Also this picture is from my newsletter (which you can sign up for on my website) header and I thought it was cute so I wanted to post ☺️
College, Stress, and your Tipping Point. College stress can feel like a game of jenga: one false move and you’re crying in public. Full video here on how to handle stress while at college!
On becoming a different version of yourself:
(as I sit in the uncomfortable-ness of my own change!!)
This has been on my mind lately. Maybe it’s summer turning into fall, but I just feel a lot of change all around me.
It’s okay to evolve into a different version of yourself. It can be overwhelming to feel sort of unrecognizable to yourself, but it’s all part of growth. I know a lot of my college freshmen feel this way. Any experience that stretches you or helps you evaluate what you want and how to get there, can be uncomfortable. You’re just becoming a more truthful version of yourself. Be patient. Be gentle. Have a dance party. Cry. Call your mentors. Tell the people you love, that you love them. This too shall pass. 📸 by @maja_bee
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on college roommates a little late to posting this because many of you have already moved into your dorms, but just a note on living with roommates for the first time. My biggest piece of advice is to have zero expectations. Most of you will be squeezed into a room with a stranger. Don’t put pressure on the roommate situation by thinking that you guys should be best friends, invite each other to everything, have the same philosophies or standards of living. You just have to be open. There can be so much newness in college and being in this major life transition can be overwhelming. Take this time to get curious about yourself, about others, about your needs, likes, and dislikes. College, and freshman year especially, can be an amazing time for self-discovery if you allow it. ** Bigger piece of advice** Figure out your roommate’s schedule and pencil in alone time. Most places at school are common areas so it can be hard to find time to be by yourself and decompress. Everyone needs time by themselves so schedule it when your roommate is at class and you’re not. 📸 by @maja_bee
Self-care is a wellness buzz word that I usually roll my eyes at, but I’ve been focused on what means to take really good care of ourselves in all ways. It’s so easy to get overwhelmed in college and put yourself last, that’s why I’m sharing self-care practices to help you feel better about everything you have going on. In this free gift, you’ll get 28 self-care ideas and a video where I give personal detail on how to implement them in your life. These are EASY (most of them free) things you can do that really make a difference! For the free mentoring click here.
Mind Body Medicine
Back-to-school can stir up lots of feelings and it’s basically been the focus of all my sessions since the beginning of August. A topic I’ve shared with my students is the mind body connection or how your thoughts and emotions can affect your physical condition. Not as a replacement for medical advice, but whenever I feel out of sorts in my body, I try to think of the emotional component in a literal way. Examples:
A friend said she had no appetite and I asked, “What’s eating you up?”
I had heartburn and my mom asked me, “What’s burning your heart?”
A student had a neck ache and I asked, “Is anyone in your life being a pain in the neck?”
My hip flexors were super tight and I asked myself, “Where am I being inflexible?”
Mindful questions can help you see yourself or situation from a perspective that maybe you didn’t consider before. Pay attention to how you feel physically. Butterflies in your stomach, tension headaches, tight neck and shoulders can all indicate built up feelings. Your body talks to you all day long, you just have to listen. ✨📸 by @maja_bee
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During a chat with a very wise student last week, she mentioned the idea of "playing yourself." The all-knowing Urban Dictionary defines p l a y i n g y o u r s e l f as "betraying yourself by acting in a way that's opposite to your own interests or (conscious) intentions." Check out today's video about the ways we play ourselves and how to get out of our own way!
Do you Talk to Yourself? I hung out with a long time student of mine yesterday and she described someone as, "he doesn't talk to himself,” to explain a lack of self-awareness. SO GOOD. How often do you talk to yourself? Like reaaaaally talk? What's your inner dialogue? How well do you know yourself? It's all part of caring for you! There's sometimes fear around getting to know ourselves because we're afraid of what we might see. Shining awareness on the dark parts just makes them light. This is where my mentors have been so important. They help me see all of me from a higher perspective. Self-cultivation is especially important during transitions (like going to college, starting a new school year, trying something new, etc.) when you're inherently getting to know a different version of yourself. Wanna have a chat with yourself? These are things that help me start the conversation: ✨take a walk ✨listen to music ✨dance ✨spend time with mentors ✨turn off the phone ✨pay attention to the world around you ✨journal ✨go be alone Let me know how the convo goes! ** Also not talking to myself in this pic, but laughing at @leshon and having my photo taken by the talented Maja Bakija @maja_bee **
Do you Talk to Yourself?
I hung out with a long time student of mine yesterday and she described someone as, “he doesn’t talk to himself,” to explain a lack of self-awareness. SO GOOD.
How often do you talk to yourself? Like reaaaaally talk? What’s your inner dialogue? How well do you know yourself? It’s all part of caring for you!
There’s sometimes fear around getting to know ourselves because we’re afraid of what we might see. Shining awareness on the dark parts just makes them light. This is where my mentors have been so important. They help me see all of me from a higher perspective. Self-cultivation is especially important during transitions (like going to college, starting a new school year, trying something new, etc.) when you’re inherently getting to know a different version of yourself. Wanna have a chat with yourself? These are things that help me start the conversation:
✨take a walk
✨listen to music
✨spend time with mentors
✨turn off the phone
✨pay attention to the world around you
✨go be alone
Let me know how the convo goes!
** Also not talking to myself in this pic, but laughing at @leshon and having my photo taken by the talented Maja Bakija @maja_bee **
Click here for video. My relationship to social media is confusing. Just when I’m 100% sure I want to throw my phone in the Hudson River and make anyone who wants to talk to me come find me in person, I see a great dance video, a funny meme, or a cute outfit.
Most of the time, I feel really drained by it all and today I wanted to share a video about what I keep in mind when I’m online. People ONLY show you what they want you to see and that INCLUDES ME. I am a billion times more than what I share here. Highs, lows, and everything in between.
Side note, I feel like this is super important for college freshmen. It’s so easy to think that everyone is adjusting to college life better than you based on social media! It’s not true. College is a big transition. It’s normal to be multi-feeling about it! Click here for video.