what to know if you want to transfer
Transferring schools is a big decision and not something to take lightly! This pep talk shares what you need to know when you consider leaving the school you’re at, how making a change is never the end of the world, and why understanding where you’re coming from is a huge part of the process.
what you’re really looking for when you’re lonely
Feeling lonely is a completely human experience, but it can be so difficult! This topic has been floating through my private practice lately so I wanted to share with you here. Today we chat about the difference between being alone and lonely, what you’re really looking for when you’re lonely, and the ways we miss subtle bids for connection.
ritualizing your routine: ideas for inner practices
There’s obvious change that happens in life where you know it’s coming like starting or graduating college, but then there’s not-so-obvious big changes like letting go of an old thought pattern or deciding you want something and figuring out how to go after it. We pay a lot of attention to the big changes, but I’ve found that most change comes from the sum of many subtle shifts. Today’s pep talk is not about managing change, but more about when the change you want to see in your life isn’t really happening, if you feel stuck, or what to think about when you want something to change.
what’s the story you’re telling yourself?
“I’m not good enough.” “I’m not smart enough.” “I can’t do that.” Have you ever said any of those to yourself? The stories we tell ourselves (about ourselves) are incredibly important and believe it or not for many people, a life long story you create about yourself can start during high school. In today’s pep talk, I share some common high school stories that pop up during the college process, how they affect your present, and how to change your story if you don’t love the one you’re telling yourself.
confidence versus competence
mentor insight when someone is unkind
A year ago I took a walk with my sister and vented about a friend I felt was unkind to me. I went on and on, when she looked at me and said something that changed my mind about the situation. Have you ever had someone be mean to you? Yeah, we’ve all been there. In today’s pep talk, I share what it really means when someone is unkind to you and how this perspective can help you feel better.
Ever try to relax and then tell yourself all the things you should be doing instead? I should be studying. I should be doing my laundry. I should be out with friends. This definitely ruins relaxing and I’ve seen it spike during the pandemic when we don’t have clear boundaries between all of our activities. Today’s pep talk, I share a quick tip for get out of the “shoulds” when it comes to downtime.
stack stress support
productivity pep talk
ritualizing your routine
Stack stress is a term I’ve made up to describe what happens when you have a lot going on at once, put caring yourself allll the way at the bottom of your list, then one tiiiiny thing tips everything over. Sound familiar? I bet it does for many! If you’ve ever cried over feeling overwhelmed this is the episode for you. In today’s pep talk, I share 3 things you can do when you feel the pressure of stack stress.
an easy exercise for shifting stress
all the stress
ICYMI: my current favs
It’s Spring here in the Northeast and if you’re getting outside more and wanted to something to listen to I’m sharing my current fav pep talks!
if you want to be yourself with friends:
if you want to understand yourself more:
if you want to relax:
**bonus** I know I said 3, but hey, this is my space and I want to include a pep talk on dating!
if you’re wondering if they like you:
Are you waiting to hear back from a college? Hoping to get off a waitlist? Is the unknown stressing you out? College decisions can come with a lot of feelings! Check out this bonus episode for a pep talk on a college acceptance anxiety!
“I can’t get motivated.”
“I’m not being productive.”
Have you felt that lately? There are so many pandemic related reasons for burnout right now, but one hypothesis I have for a lack of drive is how we view our value. We’re used to measuring success based on productivity, but in a virtual school/work world it looks a lot different and it’s thrown us off. In this pep talk, I chat productivity, the effect of assigning output to our worth, and a mentor shift to help with motivation.
The word “productivity” popped up in my conversations lately and it stood out to me. It’s not a theme I usually hear. Normally with my students, I get a lot of, “I have so much to do, I don’t know where to start!” or “I have a lot to accomplish and not a lot of time!” It’s not typically an issue of motivation so I sat with myself to figure out what’s going on.
My hypothesis is that we’re so used to output being tied to our self worth, but in this pandemic world, we can’t measure our success based on what we got done in a day the same way we used to and it’s had consequences. We used productivity as a measurement of success and for many, that looks a lot different right now.
What I’ve mentored my students to do when a pandemic productivity problem comes up is to shift thinking about productivity to purpose. Instead of assessing your worth is based on what you can get done in a day, focus on where you find meaning.
This mindset change can be really helpful especially as girls graduate and go out into the workforce. You can evaluate who you are based on your inner world and not look to the external all the time with how many things you got crossed off a list or how late you stayed at work. Measuring success without considering your inner world, is not completely fulfilling. To sum up my biggest pandemic productivity tip: when you feel unproductive think about purpose.