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on college roommates a little late to posting this because many of you have already moved into your dorms, but just a note on living with roommates for the first time. My biggest piece of advice is to have zero expectations. Most of you will be squeezed into a room with a stranger. Don’t put pressure on the roommate situation by thinking that you guys should be best friends, invite each other to everything, have the same philosophies or standards of living. You just have to be open. There can be so much newness in college and being in this major life transition can be overwhelming. Take this time to get curious about yourself, about others, about your needs, likes, and dislikes. College, and freshman year especially, can be an amazing time for self-discovery if you allow it. ** Bigger piece of advice** Figure out your roommate’s schedule and pencil in alone time. Most places at school are common areas so it can be hard to find time to be by yourself and decompress. Everyone needs time by themselves so schedule it when your roommate is at class and you’re not. 📸 by @maja_bee
Mind Body Medicine
Back-to-school can stir up lots of feelings and it’s basically been the focus of all my sessions since the beginning of August. A topic I’ve shared with my students is the mind body connection or how your thoughts and emotions can affect your physical condition. Not as a replacement for medical advice, but whenever I feel out of sorts in my body, I try to think of the emotional component in a literal way. Examples:
A friend said she had no appetite and I asked, “What’s eating you up?”
I had heartburn and my mom asked me, “What’s burning your heart?”
A student had a neck ache and I asked, “Is anyone in your life being a pain in the neck?”
My hip flexors were super tight and I asked myself, “Where am I being inflexible?”
Mindful questions can help you see yourself or situation from a perspective that maybe you didn’t consider before. Pay attention to how you feel physically. Butterflies in your stomach, tension headaches, tight neck and shoulders can all indicate built up feelings. Your body talks to you all day long, you just have to listen. ✨📸 by @maja_bee
✨Tried to write a blog, but came out easier as a video! What I’ve been working on lately with my students (and myself): The Subtle Ways to be Sweetly Seen✨
I heard from a lot of girls that they had the back-to-school scaries and I felt it too. Getting into the swing of things can be difficult after break (and now a snow day).
So I decided to make a list of all the resources I had for girls to help make their transition easier, but it turned into a moment where I began to reflect on what I have created. It reminded me of when I used to choreograph for dance. I would hear music and be able to see how I wanted everyone to move in my mind. After months of practice, it was complete on stage. What was once in my head, had become something greater than myself with the help of others. It conjured awe and that’s what looking at my mentoring practice feels like for me. I am in awe.
Last spring while I finished up school, I started to babysit a precocious two year old. I would try (and fail) to define awe. When we would look at the clear New York City skyline from Hoboken, I’d try to convey awe in terms of wonder. One night we chased a big full moon. Awe in terms of vastness. How I wouldn’t see him for a week and by the next time I was over, he’d have all these new words in his vocabulary. Awe from being amazed. This is what I feel when I look at the girls I’ve mentored. The feeling of being blown away, largely thanks to all of you.
I encourage everyone to seek out moments of wonder, not only because it feels good, but studies have even found, “connections between the experience of awe and enhanced critical and creative thinking faculties, improved health, a sense of embeddedness into collective folds and an increase in pro-social behaviours such as kindness, self-sacrifice, co-operation and resource-sharing,” (Psychology Today).
Thank you for all the awe and wishing you a 2018 full of wonder.
Last week, I held a Holiday HangIn in Hoboken where my students and I reflected on our milestones of 2017, shared what we are grateful for, and set intentions for 2018.
A fun way to look at all the different ways that the girls have grown is to use a blank calendar and fill it out with all the big (both positive and negative) milestones that have happened over the year. It would be fun to fill out one as a family!
Wishing everyone a happy healthy holiday! I’m so appreciative of all the girls that shared themselves with me this year. I am so lucky. We have new mentoring and yoga classes happening in January! Can’t wait to spend time with you in the new year!